It started with a hallucination.
That was our downfall.
Could you understand the pain I felt?
The tears I shed?
My screams?
Would you understand how I felt?
Selfish.
I felt selfish at first.
I took you away from her.
I look her away from you.
I weeped from guilt.
I couldn’t lose you.
But you didn’t want lose her.
A choice had to be made
So I chose.
Dysphoria followed behind my selfish wish to keep you.
She was the veil behind our screams
Shrouded us with pain.
Made us weep for what seemed like hours.
I took a son from his mother that day.
Even though it was all a delusion
I regret what I did.
I loathe myself for the pain I gave you.
You don’t even remember
The convulsing
Your eyes rolling back
The blackouts
You losing your breath.
I hope you never remember
Because what I saw
What I felt…
I will remember the pain from us both
Our screams still ring in my ears
Our tears that refused to cease.
I caused you so much pain
And I can never forgive myself
Never.

 
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