The Friend and Foe of Whisky
Friend
My love the sprightly strong one, he of the beautiful blue eyes, who would instil swagger in the gallants when they foregathered with him; when thy festive band assembled, 'twould not be a feast without its due of conversation — verses and songs would be heard and many a story among them; a playful merry lad, who is an agile sportsman, who would stamp the floor right well, and briskly pirouette; 'tis he would dance, gay, droll, and airy, not looking to meanness but to nobility and esteem.
Foe
Woe to him who would make the song and not make it aright without praising the bad one who oft was a rogue: he would wither wealth and turn out the inside of the purses, and leave infants in poverty, striving, and toil; the idle waster who is flattering and deceitful, a cross senseless one without rule or respect; a great loss without gain, in joy most fleeting, 'tis a man of substance who is able to be always at it.
Friend
Son of toiseach , son of malt, thou opponent of warriors, who would put raving in the head and trembling in the feet; thou art a cloak of thawing against frost and snow that would make light of showers and weather the down-pour; that would make bold the bashful one, make weak the mighty one, make poor the rich one despite the number of his cattle; in spite of what they have of good cheer or joy or delight, thou art the most pleasant choice of any source of delight.
Foe
Didst ever hear or see, man, a worse source of delight than to be lying in ditches without hearing or strength to run, choked with intoxication, carried by men, a laughing-stock to the world where it may not be concealed; it is meeting with Rati that will fleece thee in thine affluence: those who were in his company and fellowship he despoiled unknown to them; their last resort is to take to hitting and thumping; their pates are bloodied and their staffs broken.
Friend
My love the affable hero who used to be in the fellowship of nobles, many are the engaging and excellent qualities attached to thy girdle; sharp and blue-eyed and winsome, observant and lively and healthy, strong and mellow and well distilled for banishing the (?) distempers of the body; where thy children foregather there is sport and good cheer and many a joke, and they are carefree about their money; he brings the dour man to happiness, he makes the sad man cheerful, he makes the foolish man wise and makes the wise man foolish.
Foe
Would that be the choice of the gallants — to be without sight or hearing? When they would like to go home what happens is worse: the head is their third foot, full of swellings and lumps, each member that they have stealing their strength from them unawares; they are blockheads without sense, they speak the mischief, much given to banter though they cannot put up with it; their faces are scratched, their clothes are in tatters, they cannot be sedate when they are constantly drunk.
Friend
Is it not fine entertainment to sit at table with a worthy company which is on drinking bent? My bottle, held by the neck, makes froth on my stoups — what delectable music to me their gurgle and clink! One is blind drunk, one is talking nonsense, one is weeping — wouldst thou ever have believed that? It makes the secretive one candid, the sensible one cross, and the wordy one silent but for unintelligible blather.
Foe
Is it not bad as entertainment to sit at table or to spoil my substance through worthless folly, with yelling and uproar, with strange-sounding words, blaspheming and defying the black Adversary? There is the devil and the mischief of strife and contention and of raising of fists in foolish assemblage, given to horrible and scandalous behaviour, to bruising of cheeks and tugging at hair through excess of drink.
Friend
My love the bright cheerful lad who grew clannish and esteemed, who grew spirited and hardy when the conflict arose. Thy devotees are wont to make merry, playful and handsome, asking for plenty, and drinking as they get it; jolly and good-humoured, without flinching or stint, good at the bludgeon when their play was unpleasantness; part of their custom at times (included) fists and staves and hair; 'twould be apparent from their pates that there was riotousness in drink.
Foe
Drink is devilish in its nature, brim-full of self-esteem and arrogance, brim-full of boasting and vehemence in every matter of which mention is made; it is proud and wild, it is deadly in its aftermath, it is dusty, ghastly of hue, full of fever and bad temper. One of them is prostrate, another a disgusting sight; slander there is in plenty, while they threaten (each other with) clods. It is quarrelsome and deceitful, many a time in poor taste, and without excuse in the end save — 'twas drink was to blame.
Friend
My love the vigorous sportive one, one without grumble or stint, one without concealment of coin when drawing near to him, who would lend charm to the churl, make a craven of the man of might, and make the shy one bold so that his affair should go well for him; thou art the best in the tavern, cheerful in songs, one who may not be borne with alone, but amid uproar and bustle; he is sweet-tempered and amusing, hearty and affectionate with kisses, with his right hand over his pocket, scattering wealth in his cups.
Foe
Thou chief cause of dispute, who oft didst despoil the purses, thou who didst not learn honour, 'tis flattery to be praising thee, since thou art a very expensive mercenary, who art tempting the people, going round the world to steal as much as thou mayest. Thou art given much to repentance, to strife and contention, to promising and not giving — that has impaired thy good name. Thou dost make the tippler a strumpet, thou dost make the strumpet a tippler — many a thousand evil consequences follow in the trail of drink.
Friend
Whoever first devised or discovered the precious instrument, he was a man deep of mind who was inventive and wise: who brought it from corn to grain, who brought it from malt to something more potent, who took it from a pot in grey smoke out through the worm of many bends, who took it from bottle to stoup — he compounded the substance which would remove the casing of frost from ailing men without breath; devil the meeting or tryst or assembly of host — without thy pleasant warbling there is no joy among them.
Foe
Whoever first devised the mischief, 'twas an evil cunning was in his brain — he stirred up much argument and bad language along with it; he evolved drunkenness and intoxication, he created confusion in the world, 'twere better that he had not been born to grow up, but that he had died as a small child; he stirred up trouble and contention, he bared the dirk in fists, he put pepper in devilry when drunkenness began. 'Tis not a profitable matter to follow it, but one of weeping and want, and thou canst never explain how thy belongings vanished on account of it.
My love the sprightly strong one, he of the beautiful blue eyes, who would instil swagger in the gallants when they foregathered with him; when thy festive band assembled, 'twould not be a feast without its due of conversation — verses and songs would be heard and many a story among them; a playful merry lad, who is an agile sportsman, who would stamp the floor right well, and briskly pirouette; 'tis he would dance, gay, droll, and airy, not looking to meanness but to nobility and esteem.
Foe
Woe to him who would make the song and not make it aright without praising the bad one who oft was a rogue: he would wither wealth and turn out the inside of the purses, and leave infants in poverty, striving, and toil; the idle waster who is flattering and deceitful, a cross senseless one without rule or respect; a great loss without gain, in joy most fleeting, 'tis a man of substance who is able to be always at it.
Friend
Son of toiseach , son of malt, thou opponent of warriors, who would put raving in the head and trembling in the feet; thou art a cloak of thawing against frost and snow that would make light of showers and weather the down-pour; that would make bold the bashful one, make weak the mighty one, make poor the rich one despite the number of his cattle; in spite of what they have of good cheer or joy or delight, thou art the most pleasant choice of any source of delight.
Foe
Didst ever hear or see, man, a worse source of delight than to be lying in ditches without hearing or strength to run, choked with intoxication, carried by men, a laughing-stock to the world where it may not be concealed; it is meeting with Rati that will fleece thee in thine affluence: those who were in his company and fellowship he despoiled unknown to them; their last resort is to take to hitting and thumping; their pates are bloodied and their staffs broken.
Friend
My love the affable hero who used to be in the fellowship of nobles, many are the engaging and excellent qualities attached to thy girdle; sharp and blue-eyed and winsome, observant and lively and healthy, strong and mellow and well distilled for banishing the (?) distempers of the body; where thy children foregather there is sport and good cheer and many a joke, and they are carefree about their money; he brings the dour man to happiness, he makes the sad man cheerful, he makes the foolish man wise and makes the wise man foolish.
Foe
Would that be the choice of the gallants — to be without sight or hearing? When they would like to go home what happens is worse: the head is their third foot, full of swellings and lumps, each member that they have stealing their strength from them unawares; they are blockheads without sense, they speak the mischief, much given to banter though they cannot put up with it; their faces are scratched, their clothes are in tatters, they cannot be sedate when they are constantly drunk.
Friend
Is it not fine entertainment to sit at table with a worthy company which is on drinking bent? My bottle, held by the neck, makes froth on my stoups — what delectable music to me their gurgle and clink! One is blind drunk, one is talking nonsense, one is weeping — wouldst thou ever have believed that? It makes the secretive one candid, the sensible one cross, and the wordy one silent but for unintelligible blather.
Foe
Is it not bad as entertainment to sit at table or to spoil my substance through worthless folly, with yelling and uproar, with strange-sounding words, blaspheming and defying the black Adversary? There is the devil and the mischief of strife and contention and of raising of fists in foolish assemblage, given to horrible and scandalous behaviour, to bruising of cheeks and tugging at hair through excess of drink.
Friend
My love the bright cheerful lad who grew clannish and esteemed, who grew spirited and hardy when the conflict arose. Thy devotees are wont to make merry, playful and handsome, asking for plenty, and drinking as they get it; jolly and good-humoured, without flinching or stint, good at the bludgeon when their play was unpleasantness; part of their custom at times (included) fists and staves and hair; 'twould be apparent from their pates that there was riotousness in drink.
Foe
Drink is devilish in its nature, brim-full of self-esteem and arrogance, brim-full of boasting and vehemence in every matter of which mention is made; it is proud and wild, it is deadly in its aftermath, it is dusty, ghastly of hue, full of fever and bad temper. One of them is prostrate, another a disgusting sight; slander there is in plenty, while they threaten (each other with) clods. It is quarrelsome and deceitful, many a time in poor taste, and without excuse in the end save — 'twas drink was to blame.
Friend
My love the vigorous sportive one, one without grumble or stint, one without concealment of coin when drawing near to him, who would lend charm to the churl, make a craven of the man of might, and make the shy one bold so that his affair should go well for him; thou art the best in the tavern, cheerful in songs, one who may not be borne with alone, but amid uproar and bustle; he is sweet-tempered and amusing, hearty and affectionate with kisses, with his right hand over his pocket, scattering wealth in his cups.
Foe
Thou chief cause of dispute, who oft didst despoil the purses, thou who didst not learn honour, 'tis flattery to be praising thee, since thou art a very expensive mercenary, who art tempting the people, going round the world to steal as much as thou mayest. Thou art given much to repentance, to strife and contention, to promising and not giving — that has impaired thy good name. Thou dost make the tippler a strumpet, thou dost make the strumpet a tippler — many a thousand evil consequences follow in the trail of drink.
Friend
Whoever first devised or discovered the precious instrument, he was a man deep of mind who was inventive and wise: who brought it from corn to grain, who brought it from malt to something more potent, who took it from a pot in grey smoke out through the worm of many bends, who took it from bottle to stoup — he compounded the substance which would remove the casing of frost from ailing men without breath; devil the meeting or tryst or assembly of host — without thy pleasant warbling there is no joy among them.
Foe
Whoever first devised the mischief, 'twas an evil cunning was in his brain — he stirred up much argument and bad language along with it; he evolved drunkenness and intoxication, he created confusion in the world, 'twere better that he had not been born to grow up, but that he had died as a small child; he stirred up trouble and contention, he bared the dirk in fists, he put pepper in devilry when drunkenness began. 'Tis not a profitable matter to follow it, but one of weeping and want, and thou canst never explain how thy belongings vanished on account of it.
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