I miss you.
I fucking miss you.
Angrily, aggressively,
Like wanting to punch the walls
And shout about how much
I’m beginning to forget
Those moments;
The ones
I never thought
Would leave my heart
Yet somehow they’ve become
Faded, distorted, jarred
By the interference
Of the time
In which
We haven’t been.
Couldn’t have been.
And shouldn’t have anyway
Because the real wall-puncher
Is deep-down knowing
I have no right
To miss
You
But I do.
I so miss you.
The shape of you in the corner of my eye
The smile you crack in delight or surprise
Your laugh, your look, your scent, your hair
The waft of smoke in streetlit air and most of all
The feel of you; that quiet, frantic touch
Who knew an inch of skin could hold so much:
So intense and overwhelming, that connection
So stymied and so fraught was our affection, stalled
And time-bombed from the start.
Love’s leaking through
The schrapnel walls
Of my exploded
Heart.
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