Classic Poem

We 're cleaning up the boulevards
And divers thoroughfares;
Our lawns, our fences, and our yards
Are bristling with repairs;
And soon Chicago 'll be abloom
With splendor and renown;
For ain't we going to have a boom
When Stedman comes to town?

And gosh! the things we 'll have to eat —
The things we 'll have to drink!
O'er hecatombs of corn-fed meat
How shall the glasses clink!
Our culture, having started in,
Will do the thing up brown.
'T will be a race 'twixt brass and tin
When Stedman comes to town?

There 's Mr. Wayback Canvass Hamm,
Old Craesus' counterpart;
He don't know nor give a damn
About poetic art;
And he has such amount of pelf
As would weigh mountains down,
And he has sworn to spread himself
When Stedman comes to town.

And Mrs. Hamm, a faded belle,
And one no longer young, —
She speaks the native quite as well
As any foreign tongue, —
At Mr. Hamm's reception she
Will wear a gorgeous gown
That shows all else but modesty,
When Stedman comes to town.

Now, Stedman knows a thing or two
Besides poetic art;
Yes, truth to say, 'twixt me and you,
Stedman is mighty smart;
And so I wonder will he smile
Good-naturedly or frown
At our flamboyant Western style,
When Stedman comes to town.