Classic Poem

Wine, women , and the strength of kings ,
Of old, were thought most potent things;
But times are changed, we must allow,
For MONEY is most powerful NOW.

'Tis this that makes the Lawyer plead,
'Tis this that makes the Lecturer read,
'Tis this that makes the Parson preach,
'Tis this that makes the Tutor teach,
'Tis this that bids Physicians study
The anatomy of the human body,
And all their skill exert to cure
The pains and plagues that men endure.

'Tis this that makes the maiden spin,
'Tis this that makes the gamester grin,
'Tis this that bids Clodhopper toil
And marl his fields, to improve the soil;
'Tis this that makes the Steam Boat sail
And gives her freightage — many a bale —
'Tis this that bids the cannon roar,
And vomit death from shore to shore,
Gives vigor to the wasting fire
When armies sink and crowds expire —
'Tis this that makes the wheel go round
(Whatever wheel, wherever found)

'Tis this that sends the ships to sea;
For this we fell the forest tree,
For this the weaver plies his loom,
For this we scribblers drive the plume .
It gives more brilliancy to fools
Than all the learning of the schools. —
In short, from this , and this alone,
The business of the world goes on —
Without a motive such as this ,
The world would be a stagnant mass,
A putrid Lake, whose exhalations
Would poison and extirpate nations.

What has been said, no doubt, is true,
Yet money cannot all things do —
It cannot make the globe turn round,
It cannot make false doctrine sound,
It cannot make a fool a wit,
It cannot make a clown polite: —
Dame nature's debt it cannot pay,
Nor cold December change to May ;
It cannot make a miser rich,
It cannot give a monkey speech:
What can it yet not farther do?
I T CANNOT MAKE ME FOND OF YOU .