One Day at a Time

Today I rise before dawn.
My work must begin immediately,
I have no time to spare.
My responsibilities force me from my fitful sleep.
I eat breakfast long before my family,
Alone in the darkest hour of the night.

Today is a day of frustration.
From the moment I wake up,
I feel as though my life is crashing down around me.
Confused and overwhelmed,
I recall with a shudder the struggles of yesterday,
And look with dread towards the responsibilities of today.
I hope that today can be calm,
That I can go about my tasks,
And just wait for the day to end.

Today is a day of fear.
My best friend screams at me,
Her eyes filled with tears and anguish.
“I’m going to kill myself!” she cries.
Her words are an icicle piercing my heart.
“I’m going to kill myself, and it’s your fault!”
My mind fills with horror at the sight,
My voice wavers in desperation.
“Stop!” I shout in return,
Putting all of my energy into that single word.
“Please….”

Today is a day of grief.
I mourn for those I have lost,
For those who were once close to me.
I mourn for my grandmother who worried I would forget her,
Being only 4 years old.
I mourn for my grandfathers who I admired so much,
Their stories still resound in my mind.
I mourn for my friends who have reached the end of their lives,
May they all rest peacefully now.

Today is a day of solitude.
I sit alone in the back of my class,
I eat lunch alone in the cafeteria.
For the most part I am invisible,
Only showing myself if needed.
Not that it matters,
I have work to do anyways.
Better to stay focused.

Today is a day of anger.
I am angry with myself,
For not being perfect enough.
Every failure is magnified tenfold,
The tiniest of flaws become glaring imperfections.
Why does every day have to bring with it only new obstacles,
And rarely any new blessings?

Today I work into the night.
Cooking burgers and cleaning dishes,
I earn each paycheck by the sweat of my brow.
Someday I will have enough money,
So that I can go to college,
Finally leaving this chaos behind,
Finally something will go right.

Today I return home late,
Drained from the long day having passed.
I lay awake for hours,
Staring into the darkness above my bed.
Only under the cover of darkness,
Do I allow any tears to flow,
Until I settle once again,
Into restless and nightmarish dreams.

“Hey, how was your day?”
Now how am I supposed to answer that?
When each day is filled with struggle and exhaustion,
But I am supposed to remain strong?
Yet the question – being the simplest of gestures,
Brings with it the feeling that someone cares,
And a sense of hope for the future.
“Tomorrow will be better,” I say with sincerity.

Tomorrow is a day of promise.
The struggles of today have failed to break my spirit,
They have only made me stronger.
One day at a time,
I make my journey down a rocky and perilous road,
Into the brightening sunrise of my future.