The Strenuous Life
I WENT down East to a football match; great game; I'll go again.
There played a chap they called McBride, who had the strength of ten,
And divers more, whose names I miss, but they seemed to be all good men.
Thirty men or thereabouts competed there that day.
Thirty men or thereabouts competed there that day.
Thirty thousand anxious souls observed their urgent play.
All Harvard went prepared to yell; all Harvard stayed to pray.
Bless me, how those lusty youths toiled round that leather sphere,
Lined up, rushed, tackled, bucked, and strove with ardor most severe,
While earnest lads in moving tones besought the crowd to cheer!
Governors, senators, ministers, judges, presidents of banks,
College presidents, mothers of families, matrons and maids, on ranks
Of benches steeple-high, sat round and watched those football cranks.
I sat next to a mossy fossil, forty years old, named Jim.
Neither one of us knew the game, but we went with purpose grim
— Yet humble too — to see the show and learn — if it took a limb.
" They say it's dangerous! " said I, but he said, " I don't care;
We'll get back seats. I understand there'll be policemen there. "
So there we sat and viewed the whole preposterous affair.
It turned out safe enough for us, and as for those young chaps
Who played, they all made nothing of astonishing mishaps,
Enduring superhuman-seeming strains without collapse.
They'd kill a player frequently, and on his corpse would pile
A score of them, and then pile off, and he'd get up and smile,
And kick the ball; the blessed crowd all hollering meanwhile.
A player 'd get the ball and run; another, just as fleet,
Would grab him passing, ankle-high, and throw him forty feet.
He'd land upon his head, but still continue to compete.
" Sure that one's dead, " I'd cry: and Jim — " What odds! there's plenty more.
What stubborn brutes those Yale men are! Why can't our chappies score? "
" Hi! Daly's got the ball! Now go! Down? Bless me! What a bore! "
Our beings to their cores were stirred that day by those young men,
Egregious heroes doing stunts far too sublime for pen.
Down to Yale's one-yard line they fought; Yale fought them back again.
" And all that work and no one's game! " sighed I as we turned away.
" They jolly well got their exercise, you bet, " said Jim, " this day.
In the strenuous life 'tisn't wins that count, so much as how hard you play.
" Don't bother about what's gained, or whether you wallop the proper man.
In the strenuous life, to do hard things in the hardest way is the plan,
And to keep the biggest possible crowd as crazy as ever you can. "
" Poor liver-saddened old croak, " said I, " whose thews have lost their power:
Whose muscles are soft and his spunk collapsed, and his spirit subdued and sour,
Grand is strife of the strenuous life, and the world's best hope in this hour! "
" Granny! " said he, " those were fine young lads, and vigorous through and through.
They put commendable snap, I own, in the singular things they do.
Still granting a sport is a right good sort, need we make it religion too?
" Must we add to the cross we've had so long another upright pole,
And shove the bar along a bit, till it's what they call a goal,
And say you must drive between the posts as you hope to save your soul?
" There's more to life than hustling, man, though hustling has its place,
There's virtue in contentment still; tranquillity's a grace;
According to his legs and lungs, must each man set his pace. "
I've thought about it often since, and doubtless shall again.
The strenuous life's a tip-top thing, I guess, for strenuous men
Whose necks are short, and whose heads are hard, and who have the strength of ten.
They're skittish creatures anyhow; unless they have due vent
We'll have them putting up on us with maybe good intent,
Hair-raising jobs, to which we could not possibly assent.
To get them in between the shafts and let their shoulders feel
The public load, 's a scheme that well to prudence may appeal.
While we, the timid, stand by to clamp on brakes and shoe the wheel.
Our strenuous friends who can't be cured, let them be strenuous still.
If they'll be strenuous to our taste, we'll cheer them to their fill,
And plank our dollars duly down to pay their long, long bill.
But as for us, the meek and mild, our racket's to adhere.
To docile virtue's modest path, nor let ambition queer
Our sense, nor ever lure us off a strenuous course to steer.
To pose as strenuous half a day, and spend a week in bed
Would never do; we'd lose our jobs; our babes would wail unfed.
Better to save our puny strength to earn our daily bread.
About one strenuous man to every thousand folks is right.
Five hundred lean and vigilant to keep him aye in sight;
Five hundred fat to sit on him hard when he happens to want to fight.
There played a chap they called McBride, who had the strength of ten,
And divers more, whose names I miss, but they seemed to be all good men.
Thirty men or thereabouts competed there that day.
Thirty men or thereabouts competed there that day.
Thirty thousand anxious souls observed their urgent play.
All Harvard went prepared to yell; all Harvard stayed to pray.
Bless me, how those lusty youths toiled round that leather sphere,
Lined up, rushed, tackled, bucked, and strove with ardor most severe,
While earnest lads in moving tones besought the crowd to cheer!
Governors, senators, ministers, judges, presidents of banks,
College presidents, mothers of families, matrons and maids, on ranks
Of benches steeple-high, sat round and watched those football cranks.
I sat next to a mossy fossil, forty years old, named Jim.
Neither one of us knew the game, but we went with purpose grim
— Yet humble too — to see the show and learn — if it took a limb.
" They say it's dangerous! " said I, but he said, " I don't care;
We'll get back seats. I understand there'll be policemen there. "
So there we sat and viewed the whole preposterous affair.
It turned out safe enough for us, and as for those young chaps
Who played, they all made nothing of astonishing mishaps,
Enduring superhuman-seeming strains without collapse.
They'd kill a player frequently, and on his corpse would pile
A score of them, and then pile off, and he'd get up and smile,
And kick the ball; the blessed crowd all hollering meanwhile.
A player 'd get the ball and run; another, just as fleet,
Would grab him passing, ankle-high, and throw him forty feet.
He'd land upon his head, but still continue to compete.
" Sure that one's dead, " I'd cry: and Jim — " What odds! there's plenty more.
What stubborn brutes those Yale men are! Why can't our chappies score? "
" Hi! Daly's got the ball! Now go! Down? Bless me! What a bore! "
Our beings to their cores were stirred that day by those young men,
Egregious heroes doing stunts far too sublime for pen.
Down to Yale's one-yard line they fought; Yale fought them back again.
" And all that work and no one's game! " sighed I as we turned away.
" They jolly well got their exercise, you bet, " said Jim, " this day.
In the strenuous life 'tisn't wins that count, so much as how hard you play.
" Don't bother about what's gained, or whether you wallop the proper man.
In the strenuous life, to do hard things in the hardest way is the plan,
And to keep the biggest possible crowd as crazy as ever you can. "
" Poor liver-saddened old croak, " said I, " whose thews have lost their power:
Whose muscles are soft and his spunk collapsed, and his spirit subdued and sour,
Grand is strife of the strenuous life, and the world's best hope in this hour! "
" Granny! " said he, " those were fine young lads, and vigorous through and through.
They put commendable snap, I own, in the singular things they do.
Still granting a sport is a right good sort, need we make it religion too?
" Must we add to the cross we've had so long another upright pole,
And shove the bar along a bit, till it's what they call a goal,
And say you must drive between the posts as you hope to save your soul?
" There's more to life than hustling, man, though hustling has its place,
There's virtue in contentment still; tranquillity's a grace;
According to his legs and lungs, must each man set his pace. "
I've thought about it often since, and doubtless shall again.
The strenuous life's a tip-top thing, I guess, for strenuous men
Whose necks are short, and whose heads are hard, and who have the strength of ten.
They're skittish creatures anyhow; unless they have due vent
We'll have them putting up on us with maybe good intent,
Hair-raising jobs, to which we could not possibly assent.
To get them in between the shafts and let their shoulders feel
The public load, 's a scheme that well to prudence may appeal.
While we, the timid, stand by to clamp on brakes and shoe the wheel.
Our strenuous friends who can't be cured, let them be strenuous still.
If they'll be strenuous to our taste, we'll cheer them to their fill,
And plank our dollars duly down to pay their long, long bill.
But as for us, the meek and mild, our racket's to adhere.
To docile virtue's modest path, nor let ambition queer
Our sense, nor ever lure us off a strenuous course to steer.
To pose as strenuous half a day, and spend a week in bed
Would never do; we'd lose our jobs; our babes would wail unfed.
Better to save our puny strength to earn our daily bread.
About one strenuous man to every thousand folks is right.
Five hundred lean and vigilant to keep him aye in sight;
Five hundred fat to sit on him hard when he happens to want to fight.
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