Classic Poem

Courage, dear Moll! and drive away despair;
Mopsa, who in her youth was scarce thought fair,
In spite of age, experience, and decays,
Set up for charming in her fading days:
Snuffs her dim eyes to give one parting blow —
Have at the heart of every ogling beau!
This goodly goose, all feathered like a jay,
So gravely vain and so demurely gay,
Last night, to grace the court, did overload
Her bald buff forehead with a high commode;
Her steps were managed with such tender art
As if each board had been a lover's heart.
In all her air, in every glance, was seen
A mixture strange 'twixt fifty and fifteen.
Crowds of admiring fops about her press —
Hampden himself delivers their address,
Which she accepting, with a nice disdain,
Owned 'em her subjects and began to reign.
Fair Queen of Fopland is her royal style:
Fopland, the greater part of this great Isle,
Nature did ne'er more equally divide
A female heart 'twixt piety and pride.
Her watchful maids prevent the peep of day,
And all in order on her toilet lay;
Prayer book and patch box, sermon notes and paint,
At once t'improve the sinner and the saint.

Farewell, friend Moll, expect no more from me;
But if you would a full description see,
You'll find her somewhere in the litany
With pride, vainglory, and hypocrisy.