Classic Poem

For years I led a dreary life!
The days passed slowly, one by one;
I fed the ducks, reproved my wife,
Played Handel's Largo on the fife,
Or gave the dog a run.
I neither realised nor knew
The pleasures of a private Zoo.

I never loved a dear gazelle,
To glad me with its soft black eye,
Nor ever to my lot it fell
To know a penguin really well,
Till, early last July,
I bought a small menagerie,
And oh! the difference to me!

Now, when my spouse, perverse or cold,
Induces an attack of dumps,
I feel encouraged and consoled
When in their manege I behold
My camels' greater humps;
I fly from dear mama-in-law
To Kate, my talkative macaw.

When statesmen's speeches are disgraced
By vulgar insults which denote
A lamentable lack of taste,
I seek my monkey-house in haste
To find an antidote;
I turn for manners to the lair
Of Bosco, my performing bear.

Those " lions " whom we fête and feed,
Heroes of sword or brush or pen,
Are they more dignified, indeed,
Than creatures of that nobler breed
Which decorate my den?
The more my fellow-men I view,
The more I love my private Zoo!