Classic Poem

1.

Deserted and scorned, the proud Marlborough sate
Upbraiding himself with the turn of his fate
Till, o'ercharged with sorrow, he raised his head
And in praise of himself, and his family, said:
" The staff I did wield
At the court (ne'er in field)
I now to a Sooterkin Dutchman must yield.
Ah, Churchill! how much better mightst thou prevail,
Would'st thou hang up thy sword, and stick to thy tail!

2.

" Must I who in battles such wonders did do,
(That still my own guts and my breeches do rue)
Must I, who alone did a regiment maul,
By receiving their pay and carrying off all,
(Nay stories can tell
I fought it so well,
I stripped very many, though ne'er a one fell.)
Ah, Churchill! etc.

3.

" Admit that I have no desert of my own,
Yet that of our family's publicly known.
My mother ne'er failed to quench the chaste fire
Of every young spark who declared his desire;
Nay, since her youth's past,
She her time does not waste,
But procures that for others which she cannot taste.
Ah, Churchill! etc.

4.

" The spawn of the sexton, my sister, you'll find,
Enjoyed once by all, now scorned by mankind,
The sink of the nation, outcast of the stews,
As pocky as Hinton, as lewd as Peg Hughes;
Nay, one would have swore
That had seen this sly whore,
When she married the colonel, she'd ne'er done it more.
Ah, Churchill! etc.

5.

" There's the bully, my brother, the lord of the seas,
Who ne'er fired a gun but to their majesties.
My wife (the dear partner of my marriage bed)
Though disarmed of the rest, takes care of my head.
The peer with one eye
Does as oft with her lie,
As Portland with him I raised so high.
Ah, Churchill! etc.

6.

" Lest I should a line of such worthies disgrace,
Great deeds I have done to ennoble my race:
I pimped for my sister when first she turned whore,
And the title of lord I got on her score;
I always took care
That whene'er I did swear,
My oath was as false and as common as her.
Ah, Churchill! etc.

7.

" At last to complete my life and my glory,
And make me renowned for ever in story,
I called foreign forces our religion to aid;
And so by that cheat, king and country betrayed.
My master dethroned,
The true prince disowned,
I fall by the man I unjustly have crowned.
Then I the mark of ingratitude stand
For betraying the church and enslaving the land. "