Classic Poem

Judge Roy Bean of Vinegarroon
Held high court in his own saloon.
Fer a killin' or thievin' or other sech fracas,
Bean was the law out west of the Pecos.
Set on a keg an' allowed no foolin',
Closed ever' case with " That's my rulin'! "
A gun butt thump an' a judgy snort
Announced to the boys he was openin' court;
And every once in a while or less,
He'd thump with his gun fer a short recess,
Step to the bar like a spry ol' lynx
An' call all present to buy some drinks.
Juryman, witness, thirsty or dry,
Stepped right up fer their ol' red-eye.

Once on a jury a man called Hanks
Set where he wuz an' says, " No, thanks! "
" Now by gobs! " wuz Judge Bean's snort,
" I fine yuh ten fer contempt of court! "

Hanks he hemmed an' Hanks he hawed,
But finally out of his pants he drawed
A bill fer twenty, an' paid his fine.
" Ten bucks change, " he says, " is mine. "

" Change? " roars the law of the Pecos Range.
" This here court don't make no change! "
Judge Bean smiled his sixgun smile:
" I raise yuh ten an' take your pile!
An' now, by gobs, without no foolin',
Wet up your whistles, fer that's my rulin'! "

Oh, out in the West when the range wuz raw,
West of the Pecos law was law!