Moral Positions


T'other night, after hearing Lord Dudley's oration
(A treat that comes once a year as May-day does),
I dreamt that I saw — what a strange operation!
A " moral position " shipt off for Barbadoes.

The whole Bench of Bishops stood by in grave attitudes,
Packing the article tidy and neat; —
As their Reverences know that in southerly latitudes
" Moral positions " don't keep very sweet.

There was Bathurst arranging the custom-house pass;
And to guard the frail package from tousing and routing,
There stood my Lord Eldon, endorsing it " Glass, "
Tho' as to which side should lie uppermost, doubting.
The freight was however stowed safe in the hold;
The winds were polite and the moon lookt romantic.
While off in the good ship " The Truth " we were rolled,
With our ethical cargo, across the Atlantic.
Long, dolefully long, seemed the voyage we made;
For " The Truth, " at all times but a very slow sailer,
By friends, near as much as by foes, is delayed.
And few come aboard her tho' so many hail her.

At length, safe arrived, I went thro' " tare and tret, "
Delivered my goods in the primest condition,
And next morning read in the Bridge-town Gazette ,
" Just arrived by " The Truth," a new moral position.

" The Captain " — here, startled to find myself named
As " the Captain " — (a thing which, I own it with pain,
I thro' life have avoided,) I woke — lookt ashamed,
Found I was n't a captain and dozed off again.
Rate this poem: 


No reviews yet.