Classic Poem

Pomposo (insolent and loud,
Vain idol of a scribbling crowd,
Whose very name inspires an awe,
Whose ev'ry word is sense and law,
For what his greatness hath decreed,
Like laws of Persia and of Mede,
Sacred through all the realm of wit,
Must never of repeal admit;
Who, cursing flatt'ry, is the tool
Of ev'ry fawning flatt'ring fool;
Who wit with jealous eye surveys,
And sickens at another's praise;
Who, proudly seized of learning's throne,
Now damns all learning but his own;
Who scorns those common wares to trade in,
Reas'ning, Convincing, and Persuading,
But makes each sentence current pass
With Puppy, Coxcomb, Scoundrel, Ass;
For 'tis with him a certain rule,
The folly's proved, when he calls fool;
Who, to increase his native strength,
Draws words, six syllables in length,
With which, assisted with a frown
By way of club, he knocks us down;
Who 'bove the vulgar dares to rise,
And sense of decency defies,
For this same decency is made
Only for bunglers in the trade;
And, like the cobweb laws, is still
Broke through by great ones when they will) —
Pomposo, with strong sense supplied,
Supported, and confirmed by pride,
His comrades' terrors to beguile,
Grinned horribly a ghastly smile:
Features so horrid, were it light,
Would put the Devil himself to flight.