Classic Poem

If ever you meet a rhinoceros
And a tree be in sight,
Climb quick! for his might
Is a match for the gods: he could toss Eros!

Hang your kickshaws and your made-dishes,
Give me bread and cheese and radishes —
Even stalish bread and baddish cheese.

You may at Pekin as at Poggibonsi,
Instead of tricksy priest, a dodgy bonze see.

Ah, massa, such a fiery oss
As him I rode at Timbuctoo!
Him would not suit a quiet boss!
Him kick, him rear, and him buck too!

Venus, sea froth's child,
Playing old gooseberry,
Marries Lord Rosebery
To Miss de Rothschild!

" Horns make the buck" cried rash Burdett;
And then used speech befitting Timbuctoo:
" I would the horns of the creature met
I' the belly o' the king and so made him buck too!"