Classic Poem

1

One day I thought I'd have some fun,
And see how punching cows was done;
So when the roundup had begun
I tackled the cattle king.
Says he, " My foreman's gone to town,
He's in a saloon and his name is Brown;
If you see him he'll take you down. "
Says I, " That's just the thing. "

2

We started out to the ranch next day.
Brown talked to me most all the way.
Says, " Punching cows is nothing but play,
It is no work at all. "
Oh jimminy krissmas, how he lied!
He had a hell of a lot of gall,
He put me in charge of the cavvy hole,
Says Brown, " Don't work too hard. "

3

Sometimes those cattle would make a break
And across the prairie they would take,
Just like they was running for a stake.
To them it was nothing but play.
Sometimes they would stumble and fall,
Sometimes you couldn't head 'em at all,
And we'd shoot on like a cannonball
Till the ground came in our way.

4

They saddled me up an old gray hack
With a great big seat fast on his back.
They padded him down with gunny sack
And with my bedding too.
When I got on him he left the ground,
Went up in the air and circled around
And when I came down I busted the ground.
I got a terrible fall.

5

They picked me up and carried me in
And rubbed me down with a picket pin.
Says, " That's the way they all begin. "
" You're doing fine, " says Brown.
" To-morrow morning if you don't die
I'll give you another hoss to try. "
Says I, " Oh can't I walk?... "
Says Brown, " Yep, back to town. "

6

I've travelled up, I've travelled down,
I've travelled this wide world all around,
I've lived in city, I've lived in town;
I've got this much to say:
Before you go to punching cows, [your life,
Go kiss your wife, get a heavy insurance upon
And shoot yourself with a butcher knife,
For that is the easiest way.