The muckle Deil lay at the mirk pit mou',
An' hard at his heel lay a Deevilock;
While the brimstane reek wi' an upward spew
Swirled roon' baith the Deil an' the Deevilock.
As their tails like flails were fannin' the air,
Said the big ane then to the wee ane there:
" In colour an' scouk we are sib as sins,
Wi' a half ell mair we would pass for twins."
( " A wee toad spits," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Since the warl' was made ' — 'twas the auld Deil spak" —
( " That 's a far cry noo," quo' the Deevilock.)
" I hae wandered far but I 've aye come back."
( " To a het hame too, quo' the Deevilock.)
" Since first I set oot wi' a teem new creel,
Haena mortals changed an' their ways as weel!
For then I was thin an' had wark enew,
Noo I 'm fat as creesh, an' the furnace fu'."
( " Improve the draught," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Then aften I swore at the cloven hoof,"
( " It 's gey ill to shee," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' the horns an' tail scared mony a coof."
( " Faith they hamper me," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Gin I taul' ye noo ye would scarce believe
The bother I had wi' that besom Eve;
But forbid her noo, ye would find, I ween,
She would eat the crap while it yet was green."
( " Syne lift the tree," quo' the Deevilock.)
" In the early days I would aften fail,"
( " Syne sae lood God leuch," quo' the Deevilock.)
" To wile them awa' to my henchman Baal."
( " Wasna auld Job teuch?" quo' the Deevilock.)
" The brawest an' best o' my weel waled flock
Struggled lang an' sair wi' a reeshlin' pock;
I nickit him tho', at the hinder-end,
Wi' the thirty croons thaThe couldna spend."
( " He 'd lots o' heirs," quo' the Deevilock.)
" But willin' an' keen they come half roads noo,"
( " Saul! in fair big croods," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' the backward anes are baith far an' few."
( " Curse your platitudes," quo' the Deevilock.)
" They crack roon' the fire, an' are nae mair blate
Than a bonnet laird wi' a new estate:
Their hands playin' smack on their birslin' shins
As they lauch an' brag o' their former sins."
( " Hame 's aye hame-like," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' you, ye 're the warst o' my horny crew";
( " I 'm sorry I spak'," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Nae an' antrin jot leavin' me to do."
( " An' I aye blush black," quo' the Deevilock.)
" For a hungry chiel ye 've an open gate,
Help the elder pooch fae his ain kirk plate;
Nae a leein' man nor a faithless dame
But is coontin' kin, when they hear your name."
( " I 'm " Canny-chance, " " quo' the Deevilock.
" Wi' the ministers ye are mair than thrang,"
( " Took a Sunday twice," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Aye giein' them texts to support a wrang."
( " Guid halesome advice," quo' the Deevilock.)
" When in Auchterless ye suggest the prayer —
" Show my duty, Lord, lies in Auchtermair " ;
An' when stipens shrink wi' the fa' in fiars,
Siccan sizzons ban as ye mix your tears."
( " We 're a' ae claith," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Ye hae even dealt amo' stocks an' shares."
( " Selled some to arrive," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' made likely men into millionaires,"
( " Hoot, our bairns maun thrive," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Ye startit a war, an' to raise a loan
Showed a spen'thrift king how to wadset 's throne;
An' raikit them in fae the bench an' cell,
Till the Fact'ry Act is in bits in Hell."
( " Nae half-time there," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Nae a pleasant thing hae ye left aneth,"
( " There 's the company," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' a weary Deil canna look for death."
( " Here 's lang life to me," quo' the Deevilock.)
" It 's Hell to hae naething to do but sit
An' curse at the creak o' the birlin' spit;
I 'm red, red wi' rust, save the jinglin' keys,
I 'd swap wi' a god wha is fond o' ease."
( " Ha! ha! — ha!" quo' the Deevilock.)
An' hard at his heel lay a Deevilock;
While the brimstane reek wi' an upward spew
Swirled roon' baith the Deil an' the Deevilock.
As their tails like flails were fannin' the air,
Said the big ane then to the wee ane there:
" In colour an' scouk we are sib as sins,
Wi' a half ell mair we would pass for twins."
( " A wee toad spits," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Since the warl' was made ' — 'twas the auld Deil spak" —
( " That 's a far cry noo," quo' the Deevilock.)
" I hae wandered far but I 've aye come back."
( " To a het hame too, quo' the Deevilock.)
" Since first I set oot wi' a teem new creel,
Haena mortals changed an' their ways as weel!
For then I was thin an' had wark enew,
Noo I 'm fat as creesh, an' the furnace fu'."
( " Improve the draught," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Then aften I swore at the cloven hoof,"
( " It 's gey ill to shee," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' the horns an' tail scared mony a coof."
( " Faith they hamper me," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Gin I taul' ye noo ye would scarce believe
The bother I had wi' that besom Eve;
But forbid her noo, ye would find, I ween,
She would eat the crap while it yet was green."
( " Syne lift the tree," quo' the Deevilock.)
" In the early days I would aften fail,"
( " Syne sae lood God leuch," quo' the Deevilock.)
" To wile them awa' to my henchman Baal."
( " Wasna auld Job teuch?" quo' the Deevilock.)
" The brawest an' best o' my weel waled flock
Struggled lang an' sair wi' a reeshlin' pock;
I nickit him tho', at the hinder-end,
Wi' the thirty croons thaThe couldna spend."
( " He 'd lots o' heirs," quo' the Deevilock.)
" But willin' an' keen they come half roads noo,"
( " Saul! in fair big croods," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' the backward anes are baith far an' few."
( " Curse your platitudes," quo' the Deevilock.)
" They crack roon' the fire, an' are nae mair blate
Than a bonnet laird wi' a new estate:
Their hands playin' smack on their birslin' shins
As they lauch an' brag o' their former sins."
( " Hame 's aye hame-like," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' you, ye 're the warst o' my horny crew";
( " I 'm sorry I spak'," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Nae an' antrin jot leavin' me to do."
( " An' I aye blush black," quo' the Deevilock.)
" For a hungry chiel ye 've an open gate,
Help the elder pooch fae his ain kirk plate;
Nae a leein' man nor a faithless dame
But is coontin' kin, when they hear your name."
( " I 'm " Canny-chance, " " quo' the Deevilock.
" Wi' the ministers ye are mair than thrang,"
( " Took a Sunday twice," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Aye giein' them texts to support a wrang."
( " Guid halesome advice," quo' the Deevilock.)
" When in Auchterless ye suggest the prayer —
" Show my duty, Lord, lies in Auchtermair " ;
An' when stipens shrink wi' the fa' in fiars,
Siccan sizzons ban as ye mix your tears."
( " We 're a' ae claith," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Ye hae even dealt amo' stocks an' shares."
( " Selled some to arrive," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' made likely men into millionaires,"
( " Hoot, our bairns maun thrive," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Ye startit a war, an' to raise a loan
Showed a spen'thrift king how to wadset 's throne;
An' raikit them in fae the bench an' cell,
Till the Fact'ry Act is in bits in Hell."
( " Nae half-time there," quo' the Deevilock.)
" Nae a pleasant thing hae ye left aneth,"
( " There 's the company," quo' the Deevilock.)
" An' a weary Deil canna look for death."
( " Here 's lang life to me," quo' the Deevilock.)
" It 's Hell to hae naething to do but sit
An' curse at the creak o' the birlin' spit;
I 'm red, red wi' rust, save the jinglin' keys,
I 'd swap wi' a god wha is fond o' ease."
( " Ha! ha! — ha!" quo' the Deevilock.)