Squaring my shoulders back,
I begin.
Like all the books suggested,
I shuffle the paper cards
Praying these thin sheaves
Give me more answers than
A lifetime of beaded silences.
Thoughts of blasphemy shoved aside,
I allow my illuminating confessor
Witness this next sin.
To put it in the center
Where it ought to be
So open, so vulnerable
Still beyond me.
Behind the base then,
Where only I can see
The ace of misfortune.
Laughter bubbles to the surface
Hushed by the rattle
Of the china and crystal.
Past accomplices discarded
Like wronged lovers.
From there, it gets easier
To indulge in this iniquity.
Each card blemished
By entendre.
Until the hand of God beckons,
And I steel myself for the rapture.
The ten of hearts stares back.
Once again,
I have avoided Judgement Day.
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