Member Poem

As I walked past the rusty, steel, barbed wire gates,
The November air freezing cold, ice shards against my face,
Wind whipping my jet black hair annoyingly around my face,
The air became warmer, more festive
My hair stopped being annoying.
The howling wind died down
The ocean blue and dove white bleachers,
A false sea that I couldn’t take in
Hundreds of people in one place, all wearing neon orange,
Like bright, shining lights
I couldn’t take it in
The breathtaking moment of trying to take it all in
I just couldn’t

Everyone was happy, laughing with honky laughs
People that I recognized smiling at me as we also shared a few laughs
Talking about our day, the blue sky above us
The sharp, deep green grass in front of us
The smooth metal bleachers  underneath us
Our loved ones among us
We all felt free, our hands in the air in sync, as we tried to take it all in
We just couldn’t

Suddenly, a loud “screech”
The festive air died down
No one knew what was happening
It was our first race
Everyone was frightened, huddling close to each other, feeling the special human body warmth,
A feeling like no other
A loud, crackling, deep voice of a young man filled our ears
My eardrums were about to burst
“All runners up,” he said
Everyone froze, including me
My neon orange shirt stuck to me as I broke into a cold sweat, I couldn’t handle it.
I just couldn’t.

The excitement, festive feeling returned as I nervously walked down to the track
My hands shaking,
Knees wobbling,
Palms sweaty.
Clang, clang, the bleachers went as hundreds of people walked down them
It was a whole new world down there
The sharp grass was on either side of me, sharper than ever,
It looked fake, like it was trying to lie to me.
But it wasn’t
I knew it.

Hundreds of people’s shoes were scratching on the blood red track field
Creating a new sound to remember forever
“Scratch scratch.”
My vision blurred. It was like I couldn’t do anything
The light blue sky seemed so far away as I craned my neck towards it
The clouds became a blur
The people sitting on the bleachers, rooting for others became an orange blur
The bleachers became a real sea, blue and white piled on top of each other in a blur
I breathed in, took a deep breath that lasted a century as my heart skipped beats
Like an off-beat drum
The race was about to start.
I knew it.