All in the Family Way


M Y banks are all furnisht with rags,
 So thick, even Freddy can't thin 'em;
I 've torn up my old money-bags,
 Having little or nought to put in 'em.
My tradesmen are smashing by dozens,
 But this is all nothing, they say;
For bankrupts since Adam are cousins,—
 So, it 's all in the family way.

My Debt not a penny takes from me,
 As sages the matter explain;—
Bob owes it to Tom, and then Tommy
 Just owes it to Bob back again.
Since all have thus taken to owing ,
 There's nobody left that can pay;
And this is the way to keep going,—
 All quite in the family way.

My senators vote away millions,
 To put in Prosperity's budget;
And tho' it were billions or trillions,
 The generous rogues would n't grudge it.
'T is all but a family hop ,
 'T was Pitt began dancing the hay;
Hands round!—why the deuce should we stop?
 'T is all in the family way.

My laborers used to eat mutton,
 As any great man of the State does;
And now the poor devils are put on
 Small rations of tea and potatoes,
But cheer up, John, Sawney, and Paddy,
 The King is your father, they say;
So even if you starve for your Daddy,
 'T is all in the family way.

My rich manufacturers tumble,
 My poor ones have nothing to chew;
And even if themselves do not grumble
 Their stomachs undoubtedly do.
But coolly to fast en famille ,
 Is as good for the soul as to pray;
And famine itself is genteel,
 When one starves in a family way.

I have found out a secret for Freddy,
 A secret for next Budget day;
Tho' perhaps he may know it already,
 As he too 's a sage in his way.
When next for the Treasury scene he
 Announces “the Devil to pay,”
Let him write on the bills, “ nota bene ,
 “'T is all in the family way.”
Rate this poem: 


No reviews yet.